Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Winston is 11 months old
Winston turned 11 months old Sunday. He is still pudgy and funny. His newest things are standing up, trying new foods, and enjoying the playground at the mall. Here are some videos.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Another Wonder Kid
Britain’s elections are over and David Cameron became the youngest Prime Minister in Britain in almost 200 years. Gordon Brown gave a very restrained farewell address, looking as grim as ever if not more.
"Only those who have held the office of prime minister can understand the full weight of its responsibilities and its great capacity for good." Brown said he had "loved the job, not for its prestige, its titles and its ceremony, which I do not love at all." - hmm, really?
"No, I loved the job for its potential to make this country I love fairer, more tolerant, more green, more democratic, more prosperous, more just — truly a greater Britain."
A young and exuberant David Cameron and his even younger wife Samantha are now Britian’s first couple. A lot of emphasis has been placed on David Cameron being young. Somehow it reminds me of another young politician, who was full of energy and promise, who talked eloquently and inspiringly, who was married to an equally highly educated professional woman who always made more money than he did, and who gave the country a sense that it’s on the verge of a new beginning. In summary – a wonder kid.
Sure enough, not only would he be elected, he would be re-elected as well a few years later. And he would see a prosperity in his country that made him feel giddy and intoxicated with success. He was sharp and competent, but he was perhaps more in love with himself than his country.
Yes, I am talking about Bill Clinton. And yes, I am talking about Tony Blair. And yes, I used to be a fan of both of them. And yes, I now feel that they have done their own parties a huge disfavor, because they focused too much on themselves as opposed to what they are supposed to stand for. They both left the door wide open for the opposition to come in and undo everything.
In the case of Bill Clinton, he was disgraced by the Monica Lewinsky scandal, but he was not destroyed by it. In fact, towards the end of his presidency, he remaned fairly popular. True, Al Gore was and still is rather dull, and that made it more challenging for him in electoral politics. But more importantly, Al Gore felt that he had to distance himself from Bill Clinton, which made it almost impossible for hm to take the credit for the prosperous Clinton years. Besides, Al Gore was always in the shadows of Bill Clinton, and somehow all the credit went to Clinton. After the controversial 2000 elections put George W. Bush in the White House, the country went through 8 years of bad, worse and even worse. Now that there has been some distance between now and the Clinton years, I am beginning to see how Bill Clinton had done the “progressive” agenda (I would rather not use the word “liberal” because it emphasizes the wrong things) serious damage by pushing for his own success at the expense of his successor, and thereby at the expense of what is good for the country in the long haul beyond his presidency.
And likewise Tony Blair. He was hugely popular at the beginning, although many people claim that Gordon Brown should have got the credit for the strong economy in the first half of the Blair years. But Gordon Brown is the British version of Al Gore – no one can get excited over this gloomy looking Gordon Brown. I still do not quite understand if Tony Blair truly believed in the just cause for an Iraqi invasion, but he sounded sure of himself. He dragged Britain into the war started by George W. Bush, and therefore his standing went along that of George W. Bush. Poor Gordon Brown fared better than Al Gore in that he at least got a taste of what it’s like to sit in the office of 10 Downing Street, but he certainly did not get in at the right time. The wonder kid before him had all the fun, took all the good times with him, and left a mess behind for him to clean up. And no one, not even a wonder kid in his party could do that.
So another wonder kid of the opposition has shown up – David Cameron. Why does history always repeat itself?
"Only those who have held the office of prime minister can understand the full weight of its responsibilities and its great capacity for good." Brown said he had "loved the job, not for its prestige, its titles and its ceremony, which I do not love at all." - hmm, really?
"No, I loved the job for its potential to make this country I love fairer, more tolerant, more green, more democratic, more prosperous, more just — truly a greater Britain."
A young and exuberant David Cameron and his even younger wife Samantha are now Britian’s first couple. A lot of emphasis has been placed on David Cameron being young. Somehow it reminds me of another young politician, who was full of energy and promise, who talked eloquently and inspiringly, who was married to an equally highly educated professional woman who always made more money than he did, and who gave the country a sense that it’s on the verge of a new beginning. In summary – a wonder kid.
Sure enough, not only would he be elected, he would be re-elected as well a few years later. And he would see a prosperity in his country that made him feel giddy and intoxicated with success. He was sharp and competent, but he was perhaps more in love with himself than his country.
Yes, I am talking about Bill Clinton. And yes, I am talking about Tony Blair. And yes, I used to be a fan of both of them. And yes, I now feel that they have done their own parties a huge disfavor, because they focused too much on themselves as opposed to what they are supposed to stand for. They both left the door wide open for the opposition to come in and undo everything.
In the case of Bill Clinton, he was disgraced by the Monica Lewinsky scandal, but he was not destroyed by it. In fact, towards the end of his presidency, he remaned fairly popular. True, Al Gore was and still is rather dull, and that made it more challenging for him in electoral politics. But more importantly, Al Gore felt that he had to distance himself from Bill Clinton, which made it almost impossible for hm to take the credit for the prosperous Clinton years. Besides, Al Gore was always in the shadows of Bill Clinton, and somehow all the credit went to Clinton. After the controversial 2000 elections put George W. Bush in the White House, the country went through 8 years of bad, worse and even worse. Now that there has been some distance between now and the Clinton years, I am beginning to see how Bill Clinton had done the “progressive” agenda (I would rather not use the word “liberal” because it emphasizes the wrong things) serious damage by pushing for his own success at the expense of his successor, and thereby at the expense of what is good for the country in the long haul beyond his presidency.
And likewise Tony Blair. He was hugely popular at the beginning, although many people claim that Gordon Brown should have got the credit for the strong economy in the first half of the Blair years. But Gordon Brown is the British version of Al Gore – no one can get excited over this gloomy looking Gordon Brown. I still do not quite understand if Tony Blair truly believed in the just cause for an Iraqi invasion, but he sounded sure of himself. He dragged Britain into the war started by George W. Bush, and therefore his standing went along that of George W. Bush. Poor Gordon Brown fared better than Al Gore in that he at least got a taste of what it’s like to sit in the office of 10 Downing Street, but he certainly did not get in at the right time. The wonder kid before him had all the fun, took all the good times with him, and left a mess behind for him to clean up. And no one, not even a wonder kid in his party could do that.
So another wonder kid of the opposition has shown up – David Cameron. Why does history always repeat itself?
Thursday, May 6, 2010
The Ideal Company
A friend of mine called me today and asked me if I wanted to go see the movie “Iron Man” tomorrow with her. “How do you have time on a week day to watch a movie?” I asked.
“It’s organized by the company, since we each get two tickets, and my husband will not be able to make it.”
Oh yes, of course. This is not just any company. This is the company where people love to stay on campus and work long hours; this is the company where the free and all-you-can-eat cafeterias serve better food than most sit-down restaurants; this is the company where every need of employees has been anticipated and considered; this is the company whose campus itself is a display of inspiration for innovation and creativity; this is the company which has inspired many to embark on new ventures.
This is Google.
“It’s organized by the company, since we each get two tickets, and my husband will not be able to make it.”
Oh yes, of course. This is not just any company. This is the company where people love to stay on campus and work long hours; this is the company where the free and all-you-can-eat cafeterias serve better food than most sit-down restaurants; this is the company where every need of employees has been anticipated and considered; this is the company whose campus itself is a display of inspiration for innovation and creativity; this is the company which has inspired many to embark on new ventures.
This is Google.
Time Flies
Time does sneak up on you. I cannot remember the first time I noticed that I was older than the movie stars and celebrity athletes. All of a sudden, I realized that I no longer idolized these people, largely because I myself was already older! As a little girl, my friends and I would talk about these people, wide-eyed and excited, and day-dream about being like them when we grew up. Then one day I realized that I grew up, and I lost interest in following their words and actions like a groupie.
Britain’s parliamentary elections happened today. I have not followed the elections, although I know that the Tories are likely coming back in power. The leader of the Tories, David Cameron, is considered a fairly young politician, at the age of 43. Of course that fact in itself is nothing surprising, since Tony Blair became the Prime Minister at the age of 44. Bill Clinton was a couple of years older when he was elected in 1992. And JFK was elected at the age of 43, making him the youngest American president ever.
A trivial fact that caught my attention is the age of David Cameron’s wife Samantha, who has just turned 39. She’s expecting the couple’s fourth child.
It is hard not to notice some of the similarities between the Camerons and the Kennedys. Both couples came from money and power, received privileged education and grew up in privilege. Jackie Kennedy was pregnant during the presidential campaign as well.
Katharine Graham wrote about her excitement during the 1960 presidential election, as it was the first time that the person who might become the president was the same age as she was, as opposed to someone much older. It made her feel empowered and energized. It gave her a sense that something important would happen, and that she was seeing history made in front of her.
Perhaps it is because I am merely a distant observer as opposed to a participant of the UK parliamentary elections; perhaps it is because lately the news have all been rather dismal on all fronts in the world, with the economy showing signs of weakness over and over again; perhaps it is because I now realize that starting another company on the heels of my previous success remains as challenging as before if not more, due to various factors, not the least of which is the deepening recession and worsening investor confidence; and perhaps it is because I still live in this depressing house where the winds are often howling at 30 mph – well, instead of feeling “energized” by the recognition that the likely future First Lady of UK is the same age as me, I feel OLD.
In the movie “An Education”, after she finally realized her stupidity behind her relationship with a much older man, Jenny said, “I feel old, but not very wise.” - Is that how I feel as well?
Time does fly.
Britain’s parliamentary elections happened today. I have not followed the elections, although I know that the Tories are likely coming back in power. The leader of the Tories, David Cameron, is considered a fairly young politician, at the age of 43. Of course that fact in itself is nothing surprising, since Tony Blair became the Prime Minister at the age of 44. Bill Clinton was a couple of years older when he was elected in 1992. And JFK was elected at the age of 43, making him the youngest American president ever.
A trivial fact that caught my attention is the age of David Cameron’s wife Samantha, who has just turned 39. She’s expecting the couple’s fourth child.
It is hard not to notice some of the similarities between the Camerons and the Kennedys. Both couples came from money and power, received privileged education and grew up in privilege. Jackie Kennedy was pregnant during the presidential campaign as well.
Katharine Graham wrote about her excitement during the 1960 presidential election, as it was the first time that the person who might become the president was the same age as she was, as opposed to someone much older. It made her feel empowered and energized. It gave her a sense that something important would happen, and that she was seeing history made in front of her.
Perhaps it is because I am merely a distant observer as opposed to a participant of the UK parliamentary elections; perhaps it is because lately the news have all been rather dismal on all fronts in the world, with the economy showing signs of weakness over and over again; perhaps it is because I now realize that starting another company on the heels of my previous success remains as challenging as before if not more, due to various factors, not the least of which is the deepening recession and worsening investor confidence; and perhaps it is because I still live in this depressing house where the winds are often howling at 30 mph – well, instead of feeling “energized” by the recognition that the likely future First Lady of UK is the same age as me, I feel OLD.
In the movie “An Education”, after she finally realized her stupidity behind her relationship with a much older man, Jenny said, “I feel old, but not very wise.” - Is that how I feel as well?
Time does fly.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
The Role of Education
Since I became a loyal customer of Netflix, I have watched a ton of movies. The latest one I watched was “An Education” about an Oxford-bound schoolgirl in London in the early 1960s getting a different kind of education from engaging in a relationship with a much older man. Of course the wide-eyed Jenny realized that in the end the man David was not what she thought he was. While she said to him that her life was incredibly boring before she met him, she eventually realized that she wanted that “boring life” back and willingly went back to that old and boring life – and got into Oxford.
As I reflect on my own education, I feel as if I barely dodged bullets at several points in my life. There were times when I also felt rebellious and wanted to do wild things like Jenny, and there were times when I did not feel like applying myself any more. There were times when I started risky ventures, without truly understanding the odds against me. There were times when I made rash decisions, without fully digesting the potential consequences.
From reflecting on my own education, what have I learned the most from each period of my education, that hopefully my son Winston will learn in each step of his education?
As I reflect on my own education, I feel as if I barely dodged bullets at several points in my life. There were times when I also felt rebellious and wanted to do wild things like Jenny, and there were times when I did not feel like applying myself any more. There were times when I started risky ventures, without truly understanding the odds against me. There were times when I made rash decisions, without fully digesting the potential consequences.
From reflecting on my own education, what have I learned the most from each period of my education, that hopefully my son Winston will learn in each step of his education?
- from elementary school on until high school, I sure studied a great deal. But much of that has already been forgotten. What I learned from that period is the habit of working hard, and the notion that hard work is not only necessary, but also completely doable. That was my foundation.
- from college until graduate school, it was a rather confusing period of my life. I think I could have made much better use of the resources available to me at Peking University, Harvard and MIT. But I was overwhelmed by the possibilities, the options and the ambiguitiies associated with making any typpe of choices. I was a bit lost throughout that period. Fortunately I had retained that hard-working habit that sustained me throughout this period, so that I could finish my formal education and move on with my life, albeit a bit uncertain about what I truly wanted to do.
- at my first job out of school at Genzyme, compared to Harvard, it was like a two-year long vacation for me. I learned about biotech companies; I learned about real working people and learned that what concerened most of them often was not work; I learned biology, economics and finance by taking classes after work; I chatted with friends and met with friends often; and I finally decided that I wanted to give business a try by applying to McKinsey and getting a job offer from The Firm. In a way, I did not learn too much, but this two-year hiatus gave me some time to recuperate from the previous arduous academic journey.
- at McKinsey was my second postgraduate education. I never used a PC before joining McKinsey; I never used Excel before; I had no systematic schooling in economics or business before; I had no experience. It was very tough, and I hated every minute of it. Now, almost 10 years later, I reflect on my McKinsey experience with immense gratitude. Unbeknownst to myself, that intensive period at McKinsey was like a military boot camp. While I whined and complained, afterwards I emerged as a soldier. I then knew how to talk and do business.
- At Syrrx and DPI, the two biotech companies where I did business development, I learned a great deal about the biotech industry in general, but overall it was an easy ride at both places. Perhaps the most important learning from both places is to identify mentors wherever you are, because they are much more helpful and important than any textbooks or classes you can find.
- At LEAD, the company which I started from scratch, it was my real practical education. I learned about starting a company; I learned about raising money; I learned about people and what drives them; I learned the essence of those principles taught at Havard Business School or written in best-selling business books such as “Good to Great”; I learned to be philosophical and yet action-oriented; and I learned about setbacks and heartbreaks. It was a risky education pathway for me, as I could have turned out bruised and bitter. But at least for now, I hope that I have turned out “older and wiser”.
A mother's worries
The other day, a friend of mine looked up the latest photos online for Winston (picasaweb.google.com/michaelzlin) and wrote me the following message:
“Winston is so unbelievably cute! Seriously, and I've seen many cute babies. And is he always in such a good mood? You still look a little stressed though. Usually mothers with such happy and thriving babies have a glow about them, which says something along the line of "I am content and settling down". None of that in you yet from what I can see.”
And I wrote back, “Indeed you are right that I am not content at all, and in fact, rather stressed out. I don’t think I can take credit for Winston’s being happy, but I do take credit for figuring out (in many cases although I still failed in a few) very quickly what’s bothering him, so that things can be fixed quickly instead of having him suffer for long, which could make him perpetually cranky. For instance, often I would wake up in the middle of the night (because he wimpered a little bit but did not wake up) and then started thinking about what could be bothering him, so that I could do some experiments to figure out. Those sleepless nights were in a way self-inflicted.
My dedication to him is certainly no less than how I was dedicated to my first startup company, when I also would stay up at night figuring out how to keep the team together till we could see some hope of financing, etc. When others were sound asleep, I would be thinking, and frequently those thoughts did turn to productive actions, but of course many did not. So everything did come at a cost.”
I took Winston to a children’s play place in the nearby shopping mall. He’s perhaps the only kid there that could not walk around easily on his own – everyone else was running around. First, he was so scared that he would start crying immediately after I put him down somewhere. He was completely overwhelmed by the frenzy going on around him, with kids laughing, tumbling and running as well as music blasting. But after a while, he felt better and more comfortable and he was then playing as well, and even laughing his head off when he was in the jumping house. I was so happy that he adjusted quickly to the new environment.
It occurred to me that many years ago when I told a friend that I did not want to have kids because I did not want to give the kid the sense of responsibility to live the kind of life I wanted for myself – a terrible burden to bear but frequently the case with Asian families. Now I realize that it is very hard for a mother to not wish for her son everything that she would have loved herself growing up. Now that still is a heavy burden to bear, especially for an only child.
Poor Winston...
“Winston is so unbelievably cute! Seriously, and I've seen many cute babies. And is he always in such a good mood? You still look a little stressed though. Usually mothers with such happy and thriving babies have a glow about them, which says something along the line of "I am content and settling down". None of that in you yet from what I can see.”
And I wrote back, “Indeed you are right that I am not content at all, and in fact, rather stressed out. I don’t think I can take credit for Winston’s being happy, but I do take credit for figuring out (in many cases although I still failed in a few) very quickly what’s bothering him, so that things can be fixed quickly instead of having him suffer for long, which could make him perpetually cranky. For instance, often I would wake up in the middle of the night (because he wimpered a little bit but did not wake up) and then started thinking about what could be bothering him, so that I could do some experiments to figure out. Those sleepless nights were in a way self-inflicted.
My dedication to him is certainly no less than how I was dedicated to my first startup company, when I also would stay up at night figuring out how to keep the team together till we could see some hope of financing, etc. When others were sound asleep, I would be thinking, and frequently those thoughts did turn to productive actions, but of course many did not. So everything did come at a cost.”
I took Winston to a children’s play place in the nearby shopping mall. He’s perhaps the only kid there that could not walk around easily on his own – everyone else was running around. First, he was so scared that he would start crying immediately after I put him down somewhere. He was completely overwhelmed by the frenzy going on around him, with kids laughing, tumbling and running as well as music blasting. But after a while, he felt better and more comfortable and he was then playing as well, and even laughing his head off when he was in the jumping house. I was so happy that he adjusted quickly to the new environment.
It occurred to me that many years ago when I told a friend that I did not want to have kids because I did not want to give the kid the sense of responsibility to live the kind of life I wanted for myself – a terrible burden to bear but frequently the case with Asian families. Now I realize that it is very hard for a mother to not wish for her son everything that she would have loved herself growing up. Now that still is a heavy burden to bear, especially for an only child.
Poor Winston...
The Windy City
Which City has the reputation of being the Windy City? Most people would say “Chicago”. I have only been to Chicago once in the summer, so I can’t remember how windy it was.
But I want to say that South San Francisco should have that title instead of “the Industrial City”. In the movie “Volver”, when Raimunda and her sister returned to their hometowns to visit their aging aunt who was quite senile and mentally challenged, they said that it was due to the high winds of the area that many people lost their minds. Sitting in the office of my house in South San Francisco right now, and listening to the winds howling outside on a sunny May afternoon, I have to say that I am almost driven nuts by the wind!
But I want to say that South San Francisco should have that title instead of “the Industrial City”. In the movie “Volver”, when Raimunda and her sister returned to their hometowns to visit their aging aunt who was quite senile and mentally challenged, they said that it was due to the high winds of the area that many people lost their minds. Sitting in the office of my house in South San Francisco right now, and listening to the winds howling outside on a sunny May afternoon, I have to say that I am almost driven nuts by the wind!
The Maternal Instinct
I read in complete horror about the attacks on school children in China recently. How could anyone do this? Of course, the answer is that only crazy people could commit a crime as hideous as hurting and killing innocent children. I do believe that my mentality has been through a fundamental shift since giving birth to Winston. Emotionally I cannot cope with any knowledge of children being ignored, abused or hurt. That also makes me wonder about the feasibility of moving back to China one of these days, due to my concern for Winston’s welfare.
People talk about “maternal instinct” as something that women will have when they are ready to have kids. Actually I never had this instinct until Winston was born. My maternal instinct was born at the same time as Winston.
Every time I encounter a baby or a toddler these days, I always pause to look at the kid. It’s a habit of mine, and seeing them smile and hearing them laugh really do make me happy. Kids are the future of this world. They embody hope and eternity, while at the same time projecting complete dependence and vulnerability.
People talk about “maternal instinct” as something that women will have when they are ready to have kids. Actually I never had this instinct until Winston was born. My maternal instinct was born at the same time as Winston.
Every time I encounter a baby or a toddler these days, I always pause to look at the kid. It’s a habit of mine, and seeing them smile and hearing them laugh really do make me happy. Kids are the future of this world. They embody hope and eternity, while at the same time projecting complete dependence and vulnerability.
The Fun of Eating
Today I went with a friend to this “authentic German place” for a lunch (http://www.gourmethausstaudt.com/) – German sausages and sauerkraut and potato salad and of course beer. We both loved it. Still, I find it hard to imagine living with the monotony of the German cuisine on a daily basis! It’s definitely okay and even fun to have such a German fare once in a while, but sausages every day? That seems really heavy.
I recall the movie “Sissi” started with a scene of Sissi’s family sitting down for a breakfast of sausages – each person had two white sausages in his/her plate. I also recall that in the movie Franz Josef told Sissi that like her, his favorite food is Wiener Schnitzle – essentially veal fried in batter. Maybe it’s due to the dearth of vegetables and spices that German or Austrian cuisines are overall so bland. They do know how to make a good beer though!
The weather today was gorgeous. It’s May Day – Arizmendi bakery (the worker-owned co-op) is even closed today to honor May Day. Only in San Francisco perhaps do we see places that honor May Day, in the entire United States! :)
I have to say that Western cuisine really has made desserts/beer/wine/liquor into true arts, but for entrees, I believe Chinese cuisine is far better. Of course people might say that I am biased, but I honestly believe that like my approach to business, I am trying to get the best of both worlds. In other words, a real heavenly meal in my opinion will start with Japanese appetizers, consist of Chinese entrees (my favorites include Sichuan, Shanghai, Yunnan and Anhui cuisines), accompanied by Californian wine or German beer, and finished with Italian or French dessert.
Eating really can be a lot of fun.
I recall the movie “Sissi” started with a scene of Sissi’s family sitting down for a breakfast of sausages – each person had two white sausages in his/her plate. I also recall that in the movie Franz Josef told Sissi that like her, his favorite food is Wiener Schnitzle – essentially veal fried in batter. Maybe it’s due to the dearth of vegetables and spices that German or Austrian cuisines are overall so bland. They do know how to make a good beer though!
The weather today was gorgeous. It’s May Day – Arizmendi bakery (the worker-owned co-op) is even closed today to honor May Day. Only in San Francisco perhaps do we see places that honor May Day, in the entire United States! :)
I have to say that Western cuisine really has made desserts/beer/wine/liquor into true arts, but for entrees, I believe Chinese cuisine is far better. Of course people might say that I am biased, but I honestly believe that like my approach to business, I am trying to get the best of both worlds. In other words, a real heavenly meal in my opinion will start with Japanese appetizers, consist of Chinese entrees (my favorites include Sichuan, Shanghai, Yunnan and Anhui cuisines), accompanied by Californian wine or German beer, and finished with Italian or French dessert.
Eating really can be a lot of fun.
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