Due to my reluctance to spend any time finding a furnished place to stay during the week (as I have been commuting back and forth between San Diego and Bay Area), I looked at just one place available as a sublet and decided to accept it. That was July 2007. Now that I am finally about to finish my stay there, I have to say that even I myself am impressed with my own endurance. But I also learned the importance (once more!) of dealing with sensible people in my life, if I have the choice. There are enough people that one cannot reason with out there! We cannot avoid a lot of them in our lives, but when we have a choice (like in the case of renting a place), we would be wise to avoid them.
The apartment is actually in a very nice location, surrounded by million-dollar homes in the most upscale part of San Mateo. But the apartment is old and run-down. The woman (I will call her Nancy) who has been renting it for many years from property management appears not have a very steady job. She is subletting it furnished because she wants to keep the lease for an eventual return while she pursues other interests and does not have anywhere else to move her stuff.
To start with, when I moved in, the place was filthy and smelly – I had no experience dealing with a sublet and did not realize that when I was told that the place would be ready and clean, it might not happen! I called Nancy, who was upset at being bothered, and told me how she really did not have time to deal with it. A cleaning lady finally showed up, who apparently had been drinking too much coffee or alcohol or both. She spent most of the time on the phone, agitated in a way that scared the living delight out of me, arguing with someone. Finally, when she was off the phone, she told me that she was on the phone with Nancy, because Nancy was paying her too little for cleaning up a very dirty apartment! – I already paid Nancy $500 in advance a cleaning deposit, with the idea that it would be cleaned before I moved in. When I asked the cleaning lady how much she was paid, she told me that she was only offered $50! I got on the phone again with Nancy, who went into a frenzy calling the cleaning lady unprofessional and complaining once more that she really did not have time for this. The cleaning lady left, and I had to sleep in the dirty apartment for one night, before another cleaning person was sent in the next day to clean up.
Finally, after the place was cleaned up, I tried to wash all the dishes in the dishwasher. Five minutes later, there was soapy water soaking up the entire kitchen. I called Nancy again, who said that I ought to contact property management directly, even though I did not have a lease with the management – my agreement was to sublet from Nancy for $1500 a month. When I called, it started a long phone tag with various people. To make the long story short, I ended up staying at home several times to wait for the guy to show up, only to have someone come in finally (without apologies) and say that the dishwasher was too old to be fixed. They said that they would deliver a new one. When the new one showed up, I realized that it was not new – it was merely NEWER than the old one. The guy installed it and left. I started the dishwasher, and there was soapy water all over the floor again. I called again, and was told that they then did not know what to do! – After dealing with it for a while, I finally gave up.
Throughout the past year and a half, it was good that I always have a big and nice house in San Diego to return to, or else I would have been driven nuts by having to deal with people associated with this apartment. The rent went up a couple of months after I moved in, although that’s between property management and Nancy. Even though my agreement with Nancy was for a year at $1500 a month, I quietly decided to pay the new rent, simply to avoid having to talk to her by phone or e-mail. Then the rent from property management increased again, and this time, Nancy asked to split the increase between the two of us. I also agreed, because any disagreement, suggestion or complaint would lead to a very long and extremely unproductive string of phone calls or e-mails, with me having to spend more time dealing with her.
At one point, the laundry machine did not work, and I complained to property management, threatening to reduce rent if they were not to fix it soon. Their response was “our agreement is with Nancy, so we just go after her if you don’t pay the full amount.” – Just imagining having to deal with Nancy made me quiet.
Very recently, Nancy wrote me and asked me if she could take away the microwave. I was like, “in this dysfunctional kitchen, the only thing I use occasionally is the microwave.” I also took the opportunity to ask her to negotiate with property management to reduce the rent, since the entire rental market was going down. Now, that was a huge mistake. This started a long string of e-mails from her asking me why I thought so, and how her research had shown that other places with cheaper rent were all “lesser” places, etc, and how she did not feel comfortable doing it, etc. I then realized something really sad about people like her. While she clearly is tight with money, she’s also completely inept at saving money. She does not have any confidence or sense of security in negotiating with anyone, which explains the super high price of her lease agreement with property management, despite her financial status. You would think that people like her would become expert at getting good deals – actually it’s quite the opposite.
She then started talking about how she would have to pay the rent for another 2 months after my departure without living there (because she would not return from whatever spiritual retreat she was involved with until 2 months later), how she’s afraid of losing the place (on what grounds I am not sure), etc. She mentioned her son’s death again, which happened almost 4 years ago. A simple request for her to ask property management to consider lowering the rent turned into a long saga again with her, without her actually doing anything yet. I kicked myself for even bothering with her – women like her need to be avoided at all cost, even if it means paying more money!
But my patience was running thin. After more questions from her about how to approach property management to get them to lower the rent, I finally wrote perhaps a bit nastily, “I really don’t need to bother about your agreement with property management. We all have personal situations we need to take care of, and whatever problems I have in my life are my own and not yours. And vice versa. The only agreement between you and me was broken a couple of months after I moved in. I silently covered all the rent increases for your sake even though it’s against our agreement, despite this dysfunctional apartment. I would appreciate some gesture from you on my going beyond the call of duty.” – I did not know whether a stern email like that would lead to her getting upset (when she again had the sense that the entire world owes her), or her apologizing profusely (when she realized how unreasonable she was). This time, it was a combination of both!
Due to various factors, I have decided to rent a house instead of buying one in Bay Area starting from May 1 after we move the content of our San Diego home to Bay Area, but only reluctantly. After all, you never know who you will have to deal with in renting! But with everyone saying that property value would further go down, we decided to wait for a few months before seriously looking for a house to buy.
Since I do not want to stay in apartment complexes, I have to look at town homes or single family houses, which are often rented directly by the owners. I visited several places, and the experience was quite interesting. It’s not nearly as much hassle as buying a house, but one does encounter all kinds of people.
The first one was in redwood city, and the minute I walked in, I decided to walk out – it was too dark, and run-down. The owner is this old guy that did not seem to belong to the current times.
The second one was in Belmont, which is a very nice town house. But it’s got 3 floors, and I felt that it was a bit too “vertical” to be convenient.
The third one was in Foster City owned by an old couple – their sense of smell must be all gone, as again I could smell the staleness of the carpet the minute I walked in.
The fifth one was in San Mateo, which made me believe that I would surely sink into a depression if I were to move in, for more reasons than one.
The sixth one was in Foster City again, owned by a semi-lunatic Cantonese woman, who immediately told me that she broke up with her boyfriend last year, and how she’s trying to save money etc . She said that she travelled for work often, which would make paying for this town home a waste. I instantly saw Nancy's face, and realized that it would be suicidal for me to deal with an Asian version of Nancy, despite the fact that the place was kept very clean and it was bright, spacious and modern.
Now I am keeping my fingers crossed for the house I am about to rent…
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