The Extra Mile

Today I read an article on autism. In the article, Karen Siff Exkorn alked about her son recovering from autism. Apparently, the boy was fine until he was 17 months, and suddenly he displayed almost all symptoms of autism, to the point of losing all speech by age 2. The parents went into full-blown action and engaged a team of therapists and became adept at  therapy themselves, and taught their babysitter. Essentially the son was at home engaged in 24/7 therapy. By the age of 4, he was all recovered. http://www.webmd.com/brain/autism/news/20130115/autism-recovery-possible?page=2

This reminded me of the book that Jon Stewart heavily promoted on his show, a book written by an autistic boy named Naoki Higashida "The Reason I Jump". Naoki's autism is actually on the severe side, but his mother and his clinician went absolutely beyond the call of duty and figured out a key to "unlock" Naoki. As a result, he could write a book, explaining autism in a way that's totally insightful. 

Often, I hear about parents resisting a diagnosis of a kid, presumably in the name of protecting the kid. However, now that I think about it, resisting a diagnosis often is the result of the parents' vanity, as if the labeling of the kid is somehow a reflection on themselves. The wishful thinking that the kid will outgrow is in actuality avoiding having to do much work or making any investment. After all, if we simply say "oh he will be fine", we are absolved of any responsibility. When the kid does not turn out to be fine, they can also say, "oh well, I have done my best by getting him therapy." What Naoki's mother and Karen Siff Exkorn did was to not shun responsibility and leave it to others to address their sons' issues, but to do the real hard work and go the extra mile. I bet that their kids would have been in much worse shape had they simply "done their best by engaging the therapist and be done with it".

We often read about troubled kids making dramatic progress when a teacher "unlocked" their potential, or when somehow a hidden issue was addressed. I can't help but think that Helen Keller would have stayed the same monstrous kid without any ability to speak or write, if Anne Sullivan had not shown up. In fact, she could have had a very diligent tutor who "did her very best" and still ended up far short of what she became. 

The difference is all about the "extra mile". It is the extra mile that is the hardest – harder than all the previous miles combined. But the extra mile is what delivers results, and sometimes miracles in the cases of Naoki Higashida and Helen Keller. Real love is the willingness to run the extra mile.