We Are Good People, But...

Up until about two years ago, I had to encounter incessant questions about if and when I was going to have a baby. When I answered in an ambiguous way, the well-meaning person would say that it would be much harder and much more risky to have a baby when I am much older. "Well, if I want a kid, I will just adopt a baby girl from China since they are being abandoned." That was my answer. I felt quite noble and charitable about my answer at the time.

Little did I know that adoption of a healthy baby from China is now literally impossible. The waiting list at the adoption agencies is now over 6 years for even couples of Chinese descent who presumably have higher priority than other ethnic groups. For children with special needs (sickness, handicap, or over 6 years old), it is a very fast process. Therefore, even if I want to adopt a healthy baby girl from China, I will not be able to do so.

One would naturally wonder what happened in the past few years. Chinese girls went from being "unwanted" to "heavily contested". Michael's cynical view is that it has almost become kind of a fashion statement to adopt a Chinese girl from China. I think perhaps more and more people are busy with their careers or other things in life and therefore often have to adopt a baby when they are ready to have a kid.

Our neighbor who is a computer science professor has two adopted girls from China. Even Michael cannot claim that they did as a "fashion statement". The girls are in elementary school now, which means that they were lucky to have adopted a few years ago.

I read about the Chinese orphans with special needs,and frankly my heart goes out to them. I heard from our neighbor that the condition of the Chinese orphanages was really bad, and these kids need extra special attention and care. But I admit that I do find it hard to adopt a kid with disabilities. If I ever make my millions, I do want to donate money to the poor kids in China for their care and education.

Most people, I imagine, are like myself. We are good people, but not that good.